Archives for October 2012

Give to Yourself

It never ceases to amaze me how many of us have a hard time acutally giving to or investing in ourselves.

I was there. I have changed it and my life has changed for the better. I am happier, healthier, have more positive, uplifting, quality time with my family and am busier than ever doing work that I love.

I know many women, both clients and friends, that never seem to take time out for themselves or to make themselves a priority. Everything and everyone else always seems to come first.

I know men that are in the same boat too and that will relate to this post as well. Just know dear sirs, that I am a woman and I often write things from a woman’s perspective. Also note, that over 80% of my clients are women. If you are a man, and you relate to this post, then I welcome your feedback from a male perspective. Please, just do not be offended because of the way it is written.

There are exceptions, but a common theme that I have seen is that women do not value themselves as much as they could (partly because of ‘society’, but this is another post altogether). I talk to many women that do not work outside the home. Like myself, many of them used to be career women and decided to devote themselves to family after getting married and having children. Some of these women treat ‘motherhood’, or ‘familyhood’ much like they approached their careers.

They have a need to prove themselves. It is especially hard if they do not feel as if they are contributing financially to the household. Some of them will overextend themselves to the point of physical and emotional exhaustion just to prove that they are worth something. They feel that their mate works hard so they must work hard too. The thing is, that when a woman does not feel a high self worth she sometimes will work 24 hours in a day (unpaid), just to help herself feel better.

Many of you who are in this situation end up being very burnt out. You run around constantly saying how busy you are, how unappreciated you are, how much you have to do… all in the hopes of justifying the fact that you are not bringing in money.

Much of the time, when I talk to someone in this position, they really want more for themselves. Their days are full and busy but they feel that something is missing. Sometimes they don’t even know what they want. They are so accostomed to thinking about what everyone else wants and needs they have no idea what they want or need.

Some I talk to would like to invest in themselves, whether it be to take a class, or have a massage or just a vacation. What I see happening a lot of the time, is that they talk about wanting these things but they don’t do it. They might say “yes, but we don’t have the money”, or “I can’t do that, my family needs me”, or “maybe one day, once everyone else has all their needs met, then I will take a little for myself”, or “my husband needs”, or “my kid(s) need”.

Sometimes it really is best just to take something for yourself rather than having it forced upon you. I know people who talk about taking a break, or needing some down time, all the while they say “I can’t”. Then they end up getting sick. They may catch a cold that lasts two weeks and they simply cannot keep up the pace and they may finally ask for some help, and may finally get some much needed rest.

I have known people in this situation that have wound up in a car accident. They end up having to spend a lot of time and money on massages, or chiropractic, or accupuncture, or… the list goes on. They end up getting a rest, and also spending money on themselves. It is what they had been dreaming of for months or weeks or days. The unfortunate part, is it took an accident, or an illness in order for them to justify taking what they needed.

For some of you, if you look deeply you may see that his has been a trend in your life. Are you ready to get off this roller coaster of feeling badly? What if, just once in a while you actually allowed yourself to take something, anything, just for you? I am betting that you would feel better in the long run.

It is much like any other job. You need your tools and supplies to be in good working order in order to do your job correctly. If you have chosen to be someone who is a caregiver to your family, your tools and supplies are YOU. If you give yourself rest, and fun, and relaxation (maybe in the form of a massage, or yoga, or just reading a good book), then YOU, will be better able to do your work ~ and hopefully feel good about it.

Imagine & Explore New Things

What an amazing time we are going through. The energies right now sure seem intense to most of us. Last year was a time of letting go for most, and this year has been a time of exploring new things. This can be really uncomfortable for those of you that do not embrace change. Please trust in yourself and your process and allow yourself to take those baby steps. As with all journeys, you will not get anywhere unless you take those first steps.

Shifts like the one we have been going through this year can bring about physical symptoms also. There are many who are feeling a little dizzy or disoriented, or who are having mobility problems. Even the cold and flu are impacting a lot of us (I myself had a bug). Our DNA is changing, we are becoming lighter, vibrating at a higher frequency. Sometimes it is hard to accept what we do not understand. As much as you need to be stepping forward into your new life, you may also need to allow yourself to be physically rested.

This is not as contradictory as it seems. Sometimes stepping forward into your new life simply involves allowing your creative side to shine through. Dream and dream big because all of your wishes and dreams can and will come into your life. Keep it positive. Allow yourself to say “What if?”

What if I could have anything, what if I could do or be whatever I wanted? The beginning of any journey starts with an idea, allow your positive ideas and affirmations to shape your future. The energies of our planet and our human race support growth, happiness and love. It is only by allowing yourself to dream and move forward that you can realize anything you want.

Even as I was going through healing from the cold I had, I had to rebook a couple of my reading appointments and spend a lot of time resting. On the one hand it felt like I was not doing much ‘work’ because I was spending so much time just sleeping or reading. On the other hand, while I was sleeping I was doing a lot of work on a soul level. Also, by resting and reading and just hanging out, I was able to focus on the things I that I want in my life. There’s no better time for self-evaluation and dreaming and creating than when you can’t physically do much else.

The whole point of being on earth is to live life, create, have experiences and share love. Please, as we go through this transition, just allow yourself to BE.

How to effectively shut down your life.

Just keep saying to yourself, “I know I need to do that, but can we focus on something else please?”

There’s a trend that I am seeing out there with people who feel as if they are stuck in their life. The fix is so very simple, yet most of you are unwilling to do it. That is okay, we are all on our own path, just know, that no matter how much you dream of things being different, the only place you can ever start is here and now.

I have written before that the easiest way to shut down a psychic reading is to say “yeah but”, or “I already know that I need to do that, tell me something different”, or “that’s not what I want though”. The reason that these types of statements can so easily shut down the energy of a reading and the messages from your guides, is that everything always starts here and now. There is no different future, there will be no different future, if you are not willing to change in the present moment.

First things first. If you want something in your life, you need to move toward it. If you are living in a situation that you do not like, ignoring it will not make it go away. Waiting and wishing and hoping that things will change or will someday be different without taking any action will just keep you stuck.

Everything starts here. In order to move forward you need to address the now. It is like dreaming and wishing about completing a 10k race all the while, sitting in a chair with lead weights tied to your legs. The first thing you need to do is acknowledge that you are sitting in a chair and that there are lead weights on your ankles. What would be your first step? I’m guessing it wouldn’t be to get off your butt and try to run. The first thing you would do, is remove the lead weights. The next would be to get out of the chair. THEN AND ONLY THEN would you be freed up to run the 10k. Life is like that. Often we need to take a good long look at where we are at. You wouldn’t make the excuse that the lead weights have been there for a long time, and you don’t feel like working to take them off. Why on earth do you think you can do that with anything else in your life?

Instead of getting up from your chair with lead weights on and collapsing after a few seconds of ‘trying to run’, why not remove the weights and set yourself up for SUCCESS.

It is okay to allow happiness

God does not want you to be unhappy.

I talk to so many people who think that when they are going through a tough time, it is karmic, or because they have somehow done something wrong. Some think that God is punishing them, or that they have no reason to be ungrateful because they have good things in their lives.

No wonder we go through tough times. We feel so disempowered sometimes. If only you knew just how powerful you are.

Even if we go through a ‘good’ or ‘abundant’ time, we feel guilty and sometimes, somehow, manage to turn it around on ourselves. (“I don’t deserve to be so happy when so many others are suffering”).

We are on earth to have experiences and to enjoy life. We are not here to suffer. There are those people out there who wish to disempower the masses. Its working. They tell you that you have no control, that if you have good, you must have the bad, that you have to be on medication to heal yourself, that being empowered and listening to your intuition or your guides is ‘evil’.

You are bombarded with messages that tell you what you cannot do. Its in the newscasts, on our favourite TV shows, social media, on the radio, (sometimes even in our churches), it’s everywhere.

You don’t have to listen to that you know. You can listen to what your own intuition and guidance is telling you. Its time to question everything. Everything is changing, the energy of the Earth and her humans has been changing for years now. Are you going to hop on board and start listening to yourself? After all, ulitmately, you is what you have to trust in. No matter what anyone else says, its YOU that makes a choice and takes action (or chooses not to take action, which in itself is also a choice).

We are co-creators with God. Stop listening to people who tell you you aren’t. You can have, be or do anything you want. Don’t let anyone tell you differently. Do not feel guilty if your life is good. Its okay. It can be even better if you ALLOW it to be. Why not have it all? There is nothing selfish in having what you want.

If you have what you want you are better able to share with others. If you do not have what you want, what would you have to share anyway?

Just a little rant from me today… I love you all.
Tamara

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