Archives for April 2015

Set your Intention, Then Let Go….

When working on manifesting in your life, you need to set your intention and then let go and let the universe do its job.  Intention is everything.

In your asking, you are already in the process of creating what you want.  A lot of people will tell you that you need to look at a vision board over and over, and say affirmations over and over, but this will only work for some of you.  Why?  Because if you do not hold the belief that you are a creator, and if you find your energy going a place of lack when you look at your board, or affirm positive things, you will essentially be focusing on the exact opposite of what you want.

see it when you belive it

There is a big difference between Belief and Hope

If you truly believe that you are a creator and can use the Law of Attraction to get what you want, you won’t be constantly focusing on what is missing in your life.  You will know that you can write something down, or intend for something to happen, without timeframes or dictating where it will come from or how it will happen, and you will sit back and wait.  You will vibrate patience because you know it is on the way.  You know that every time you focus on the lack of what you intend to have (impatience, upset), you send it farther away.  So you trust and wait and know.  How long to wait?  As long as it takes for your vibration to catch up to your intention.

If you just Hope that the Law of Attraction works, you will be in a constant state of doubt (maybe even just subconsciously), that you can actually create what you want.  When you do this, every time you focus on what you want, your limiting beliefs or subconscious programs will remind you that you don’t have it.  Then your focus will be on NOT having it.  You will look at your vision board and think about what you want, and then after you stop looking, you will go back to your old vibration of “here are pictures of things I don’t have”.  Or with affirmations, you will look in the mirror and maybe you can say to yourself “I love you”, but really your subconscious beliefs are screaming at you “Wow, do you ever have bad skin” (or whatever else you rake yourself over the coals for).

You need to align what you want with your vibration.  If you cannot look in the mirror and say “I love you”, can you sit down with a pen and paper and write out one (or 10) things that you can at least like about yourself?  That would be your best place to start in this case.  If you can’t believe it, then when you affirm it, you will just be affirming the opposite.  You need to start where you are at.  And if where you are at is in just with small things then start there.  As you get better and better at the small things, you will expand your energy to the bigger things.  Don’t get ahead of yourself or you will just set yourself back to step one.



I’m over 30, I’m worried I will never have kids

I have a lot of clients that are worried about whether or not they will be able to have kids.  The majority of my female clients that are 40+ have pretty much given up on ever having a baby.

I have clients that are single and are in their 30’s and they are freaking out about finding someone, and quick, because they want to start a family and they have been (falsely) told that it is much harder to get pregnant after 30, and it just gets worse/harder as time goes on.  They are told that by 40 they have very little chance of getting pregnant.

That is a bunch of bunk.  Firstly I want to say, that if you truly believe you can’t get pregnant, or that it will be difficult to get pregnant after 33 or so, you will find that to be the case.  You get what you believe.  100% of the time.

Our minds are very powerful.  Our thoughts create our reality.  I am not saying that you don’t need to take care of yourself, or support your body through life, but your beliefs around how hard it will be (or if it is even possible) will have an impact on you.

I have some clients that don’t even believe me when I tell them that they will meet their partner in their late thirties and have 2 or 3 kids after that.  They simply cannot get their minds around it because they have been brainwashed by very old information (see below).

Not everyone can give birth (or impregnate a woman).  I get that.  I also know that there are spontaneous healings, healings over time etc., but the majority of the population doesn’t have the belief that they can do it.  They don’t have the motivation to change their life or habits, or beliefs to the point that it would take in order to heal.

There are also some humans on the planet that are simply not meant to have kids via “regular” means.  This does not mean you cannot try IVF or adopt.  I have had clients where the information I got for them was that IVF would be a waste of money, I have had clients where I have got that adoption would be the best option.  I have had clients where I said “I don’t know, getting nothing”.  (I don’t always get clear cut answers).

Thing is, that our futures are not set in stone either.  Sometimes just the act of going through an adoption process frees up your energy enough in a positive way, you stop thinking about getting pregnant and focusing on your inability to get pregnant.  You start focusing on having a baby (no matter how), and get pregnant.

Our future

Some Facts and Studies about Pregnancy

The statistics that are usually cited about fertility in women in their 30’s is based on hospital records from France in the 1700-1800’s.  Say what!  Thinking we have come a long way in the past 200-300 years.

In 1982 there were 6,519 live births in England and Wales to women aged 40 or more, about 1% of all babies born that year, Office of National Statistics data shows. By 2012 the figure had risen to 29,994, or 4.1% of all live births. (compliments of Google)

According to the Daily Mail in the UK (which is comparable to the New York Post in the US).  In 2000 the number of babies born to mothers over 50 was 44, in 2008 it was 69, and in 2012 it was 154.  I am not suggesting you wait this long, as there are very few of you that would be able to keep your body in optimal health to facilitate a healthy pregnancy and birth (think pesticides, GMO’s, pollutants, lifestyle etc.).

I will say again, not everyone is meant to give birth in this lifetime, I just wanted to help dispel some of the misinformation that is circulating and keeping women (and men) from empowering themselves to create the life they want (because yes, sometimes it is possible to change an outcome with your beliefs).

I also want to say again.  That if you want to have a healthy pregnancy you need to keep your own body healthy ~ no matter what your age.

Not sure why this was the subject of my blog post today.  One of you needs to hear this.  I just sit at my PC and let it flow through me.  Hoping it helps.



I am NOT a doctor.  This is NOT a medical blog.  The opinions I express are just that “my opinions”.  If you are under a doctors care or on a course of treatment, do not stop just because of something I say.  I take no responsibility for your actions. 


Are you labeling your kids?

Sometimes having knowledge about someone’s (our kids) personality can be useful.  As in; they are creative, or they are stubborn, or focused, or logical, or some other descriptor.

These descriptive phrases basically point out where a child’s ‘gifts’ may lie.  They are not necessarily bad or good, they just are.

The problem occurs when we begin to judge how someone should be.  When we say that being a certain way is a ‘disorder’.  We label our kids as ‘autistic’, or ADD, or ODD, or ADHD, or whatever the ‘diagnosis of the day’ is.  I just saw a news story today that said the majority of kids with ADHD are boys.  The study also mentions that if these boys are allowed to fidget while in class they learn better.  How is that a ‘disorder’?

children on meds

My son has a friend that was diagnosed with ODD (oppositional defiant disorder).  I have spent A LOT of time with that kid.  When he’s at our house, he is polite and respectful and not the least bit defiant.  I have seen him with his mom and he’s a different kid with her.  He has no respect for her, blurts demands at her, and she gives him what he wants.  She said to me once “He always gets what he wants”.  I must say, he tried that with us and it didn’t work so he stopped talking to us that way.  When I first called him on the way he was talking to me he was shocked.  He didn’t talk to me very much during his next couple of visits to my home.  Mostly because he didn’t know how.  I kept talking to him normally and now he is totally comfortable talking to me normally as well.  No demands, no disrespect, no defiance, just a mutual respect between us.   His dad treats his mom the same way he treats his mom.  This is not a disorder, it is leading by example and parents training him how to treat them.  His mom ended up putting him on ‘medication’ to ‘treat’ his ODD.  All he needed was a few boundaries and to be told that respect is a two way street.

This is so sad.  How about we parent kids in a way that teaches them how to be respectful and kind, and how to cope with life (you don’t always get what you want, that’s it period ~ life isn’t fair, learn how to deal with it)?  It doesn’t take long to have a calm respectful relationship with a kid if you do what you say you are going to do and treat them how you want to be treated.

Does your kid have tantrums ~ all the time?

Do you?  Kids do what you do, not what you say.  If you fly off the handle why shouldn’t they?   If you handle upsets, or life, in a calm manner, and model coping skills, your kids will learn how to cope.

Most kids that act out do so because there is something they want or need that they are not getting.  They might not be able to sit and be a “Stepford Child” but that doesn’t mean they are ‘broken’ or need medication.  Sometimes it just means that you need to be a parent, figure out what they want or need (which is usually boundaries and undivided attention, NOT giving into tantrums), and modeling that for them.

Is your kid acting out?  Have you tried putting down your cel phone and engaging with them one on one for 20 minutes?  When you get home from work, do you get busy with dinner and ignore your kid while he/she screams and cries and fights with siblings?  If so, I want you to try something.  Try walking in the front door, taking a deep breath, picking up a book or crayons or something and sit with your kid.  Just a few minutes ~ 10, 20, 30… and talk to them.  Ask them about their day if they are old enough.  Just engage with them for a bit.  That’s what they want.

Its energy.  If you have an energy that is all over the place, stressed out, freaking about getting dinner on the table what do you think your child will feel?  Stressed out and freaking.  Give them a cracker if they are grumpy from hunger, then give them some UNDIVIDED attention.  And THEN make dinner.  You will be able to make dinner in relative peace.  Maybe your kid will even be willing to help you, or sit at the kitchen table and chat with you while you cook.  Try it.

How to respect your kids, and teach them to respect you in return

Do what you say you are going to do.

Yes means YES.  Keep your promises.  If you tell your kid(s) you are taking them to the park later then take them to the park later.  Don’t break your promise.  If you are worried about weather tell them “I will take you to the park later if the weather stays nice”.  Turn off your phone.  Don’t get so wrapped up in work, or the drama of your friend online or on the phone that you ‘forget’ all about the park.

No means NO.  Not, “No, until you scream so freaking loud for so freaking long that I can’t stand it anymore and I give you what I told you I would not give you”.  Why the heck would a kid stop acting up to get what they want if MOST of the time acting up gets them what they want?

Teach them consequences.  Do you blame others when you make a mistake, or do you take responsibility for yourself and your own actions?  Do you speed, then blame the police for giving you a ticket?  Do you overspend and then blame the credit card company for the outrageous interest that you agreed to pay when you signed your name?

Take responsibility for your mistakes, and stop rescuing you kids from their mistakes.  There are consequences for your actions.  If you are constantly telling your kids “If you do that again, you are grounded for a week”, and then two days later you let them go out, your word is crap.  They know you don’t do what you say you are going to do.  If they steal or cheat, and then you somehow excuse that behaviour or ignore it, you are teaching them that they don’t need to be responsible for their actions.

I’m not saying that you call the cops on your kids.  If you get to the point that you need to call the police to parent your children for you, you can pretty much be assured that you have missed a part of the parenting process that is listed above.

Psychiatry and Medications are BS

I am NOT a doctor.  This is NOT a medical blog.  The opinions I express are just that “my opinions”.  If you or your child are under a doctors care or on medication, do not stop just because of something I say.  I take no responsibility for your actions. 

Do psychiatric medications have a role to play?  My answer to this is a BIG maybe.  Without supports in place to deal with disorders like schizophrenia, I suppose they do have a place.  In different cultures people with schizophrenia are revered as Shamans and healers with ties to other realms and dimensions.  In our Western Culture, there isn’t a lot of time, knowledge, places to deal with such things.  If medication will help people with schizophrenia live a more comfortable life, then yes, meds may have a role to play.

For 99% of “Behavioural Issues” in kids medication is NOT required.  Some parents would rather have a pill they can give their kid than be a present parent.  If you are a part of the 1% then you may excuse this post, just be sure to take a good look at yourself before you do.

drugging of children

The Zombie Apocalypse

The zombie apocalypse is upon us.  Why?  Because we are medicating instead of understanding, or nurturing gifts, or healing.  A lot of mental health issues are due to situations in our life, NOT just our brain chemistry.  Energetically, we can change our brain chemistry with our thoughts.  With most mental health issues, it is our THOUGHTS that created them in the first place.

If you take a child that likes to move his body rather than sit at a desk for 3 hours and you tell him he is ‘bad’, or ‘broken’ instead of giving him an outlet, he will go through life either medicated, or thinking there is something wrong with him.  If we didn’t have kids that wanted to move their body, that did not have a higher physical energy level than ‘normal’, we wouldn’t have inventors, dancers, athletes landscapers.  Think about it logically.  There is nothing wrong with wanting to be physically active.  We program our kids to think its wrong, and we try and de-program our young adults to get off their butts and exercise ~ IF, they aren’t over medicated and unable to move.

I wrote this post because I often have clients ask about their kids.  Of course, “how are my kids” is a fairly regular question that I get when I do psychic readings.  The messages in this blog post have been given to at least 15 different parents over the past 3 years by Spirit.  This post is for all of you who want to know “How are my kids?”, but can’t or haven’t had a reading from me.



If you need someone to help you look at your life from a fresh perspective and help you navigate changes in your life, to see if the changes you are considering are supported by Spirit, a psychic reading can help. You can contact me here.

If you want to hear what others have said about their readings you can check that out on my Psychic Reading Testimonial/Review page.

Angel Card Reading, April 27-May 3, 2015

Here is your free Angel Card Reading for this week, April 20-May 3, 2015

For the Beginning of the Week, Your Angel Card is:

Spread Your Wings

Spread Your Wings – Archangel Ariel:  “Do not hold back right now.  The timing is perfect, and you are ready to soar!”

“Although you may feel intimidated by the prospect of change, and by the thought of moving past your comfort zone, you’re ready to fly high.  Welcome new opportunities, and know that it’s safe to follow your heart and dreams.  Keep your focus upon love, service, and spirit, and avoid nay-sayers or skeptics.  Rember that you inspire others with your story of turning challenges into victories.”

Your Angel Card for the Middle of this Week:


Archangel Michael

Archangel Michael

You Are SafeArchangel Michael: “I am protecting you against lower energies, and guarding you, your loved ones, and home.”

“Let go of worries, as I’m surrounding you, your loved ones, home, and possessions with powerful loving light. This light repels lower energies, and attracts loving experiences. Focus on this light and love – instead of on fear – as you’ll attract the object of your focus. With your mind free of fear, you have additional time and energy to devote to your life’s missions. You are free when you are fearless. Know that you are safe at all times, and that my protection is flawless.”

Your Angel Card for the End of this Week:

Healthy Lifestyle Angel Card

Healthy LifestyleArchangel Raphael:  “Eat a healthful diet, get adequate sleep, and exercise regularly for optimal health.”

You are co-creating your health by following your inner guidance about lifestyle habits.  I give you inner nudges to improve the way you eat, or to exercise or rest more often.  My prodding isn’t to nag you or rob you of pleasure.  Rather, my urgings are in response to yoru prayers for higher energy levels, increased well-being, weight loss, and a happier mood. When you take excellent care of your body, your outlook and self esteem naturally blossom.



If you need someone to help you look at your life from a fresh perspective and help you navigate changes in your life, to see if the changes you are considering are supported by Spirit, a psychic reading can help. You can contact me here.

If you want to hear what others have said about their readings you can check that out on my Psychic Reading Testimonial/Review page.

How do you wake up in the morning?

When I wake up in the morning, I usually lie there for about 10 minutes (sometimes much longer), and I stretch and think about all the wonderful things that I have (get) to do that day.  If I don’t have any plans, I think about all the things I could do if I want to.  I thank God for all the things in my life.  For what I did yesterday, and what I can do today.  I try for excitement and sometimes get it, but there are times I can only muster gratitude.  I always have something to be grateful for ~ waking up at all is a good one.  🙂

What do you do when you wake up in the morning?  How do you start your day?

Do you say “I’m not a morning person”, grumble, pull the covers up, and wish you didn’t have to start at all?  Think about how you wish you didn’t have to get up and face your day?  Think about all the stuff you have to do that you don’t want to do?

Generally speaking, do you not spend at least some of your time waiting for tomorrow to come?  If you are waiting for your tomorrow to come, what is the point of starting your day with the negativity that comes with “I’m not a morning person”.  Remember, you are a creator, what do you think you create with negative thoughts?  What you think at the beginning of your day, when you wake up and imagine what is coming next, is what will create your day for you.

have a good day

Gratitude is very important

If you cannot be grateful for what you have, you are not likely to get anything more.

Here is a very simplistic example:  I give my son $20.  He takes it, grumbles something at me, and then proceeds to tell me how $20 isn’t enough.  He starts to list off all that he can’t get with that $20.  The more he thinks about it, the grumpier he gets.  Pretty soon, he’s stomping out of the house complaining that he doesn’t have enough money.

What do you think the chances are that I will willingly, and lovingly give him $20 next time?  What is the point?  It won’t be enough, he won’t be grateful, he will complain about what he doesn’t have.  I will be unmotivated to ever give him another $20.

For the record my son has never done this and likely never will ~ he knows how energy works and he’d simply wouldn’t do that to himself.  Notice those words ‘to himself’.  Not ‘to me’.  I am not responsible for how he feels.  That’s his job and he knows it.

So when you wake up in the morning, do you say “I’m not a morning person”, “I hate my stupid job”, “my family is ungrateful and stressful”, “I have no money (or relationship, or ???)”, “I wish I didn’t have to do this today”, “I don’t want to get out of bed for this lousy life”.

If this is you, essentially you are telling God that its not enough.  You are shutting down the flow of more.  Why would God give you more if you bitch and complain about what you already have?  It might sound ‘weird’, but seriously that is how energy works.  You want a better job, but what would be the point of the Universe providing it for you.  You keep saying that what you have isn’t enough.  What would be the motivation of the Universe to give you more?

Mt. Cheam out my office window on a cool February morning.

Mt. Cheam out my office window on a cool February morning.

Try saying some or one of these things to yourself before you get out of bed, and just observe the improvement in your life over time:

  • I am alive, I am alert, I feel fantastic!
  • I am going to make this a really good day
  • What will my perfect day look like?  (then see yourself living that day)
  • What can I do today that will get me closer to my goal(s)?
  • I love my family (and then think about all the things you love about them)

You could also read this Affirmation Prayer, it covers off a lot of positive things you can tell yourself to start your day.

Here is a list of what NOT to do.  These things will just bring you more of the same old stuff that you don’t want.

  • DON’T review yesterday and see all the places that you failed to reach your goals (ie.  I ate too much yesterday, I didn’t get my exercise in, I had a bad day at work, I fought with my spouse etc.).  Remember you are creating your day.  Your NEW day, TODAY.  What you think about is what you will get more of.
  • DON’T imagine going into the kitchen and fighting with someone in your family.  If you do that, your energy will precede you and you will get an argument.  Bring your energy to your heart centre instead.  Project love ahead of you.  When you feel that, nothing external can even touch you.
  • DON’T take an inventory of the ‘wrong’ things that people around you do.  This is a killer.  The more you focus on the ‘wrong’ the more ‘wrong’ you will see.  ‘Wrong’ is a matter of perception, stop looking for it.

Simply get in the habit of practicing gratitude and being in your heart, and you will find that your creations look a lot like what it is you want for yourself.


If you need someone to help you look at your life from a fresh perspective and help you navigate changes in your life, to see if the changes you are considering are supported by Spirit, a psychic reading can help. You can contact me here.

If you want to hear what others have said about their readings you can check that out on my Psychic Reading Testimonial/Review page.

What Makes You Happy?

BE happy

So a friend of mine asked the question on Facebook, “What Makes You Happy”.  There were a TON of responses.  Here are some of them.  Not necessarily verbatim, but the gist of what people said:

  • I start by choosing to be happy and count my blessings
  • Taking a risk (and winding up happy)
  • I cannot find my true happiness outside my family
  • My happiness has been fleeting and did not last, vitamins helped with depression
  • Going to the movies
  • Being self-sufficient
  • Happiness is not something I find, it is something I strive to be

There were quite a few comments of people that were having a hard time finding happiness.  Happiness truly does come from within.  Sometimes we can get so focused on the stresses of life that we actually forget that it is okay to be happy.  We may (or may not), be surrounded by people who are unhappy and it brings our attention to all that is wrong in our world.

Just look at children.  Children know how to be happy.  All they need is some love and attention.  It is unfortunate that so many people are teaching their children that life is too stressful to be happy.  Children should be teaching US how to be happy and in our moment, but what I see is parents that are so stressed out and living in a different time; past, or future, that they cannot be present with their kids.  That just makes more stressed out adults in the future.  If you want to see a stressed out child, just look at a stressed out adult that cannot be present in the moment with their child.  When a child needs attention, and an adult is only giving them a half-assed attempt at attention, the child will scream and kick up a fuss.  Then the adult thinks it is the child that is causing stress.  That’s not the case, it is the adults lack of undivided attention in the moment that is stressing out the child.  Children can be wonderful mirrors to your life.  If you are blessed enough to have a child in your life try just spending time with them, colouring, reading, or playing with blocks, or going for a walk and looking through their eyes.  If you don’t have a child in your life, just go to the park and watch the children ~ you can learn a lot.

Truly, happiness comes from moments not lifestyle.  You have a choice in each and every moment whether to be appreciating a moment, or focusing elsewhere.  You can even find happiness in doing the dishes if you want to.  You could focus on your ‘messy, ungrateful family’, or you can focus on the fact that you can lose yourself in the moment of the dishes.  Feeling the warm water on your hands, the squeaky cleanness of plates, how your kitchen looks now that the dishes aren’t on the counter anymore.  If you go into your moment and keep your thoughts present, you will be able to find you have many more happy moments.  Happy moments make for a happy life.

Gratitude 2

This is something I have personally been working on myself as well.  Staying in a constant state of appreciation ~ it brings a lot of happiness.  I don’t have everything I want in my life, I never will because as I get what I want, I expand my consciousness and want more (or different).  Just know that when it comes right down to it, it doesn’t matter what external things you want, if you are not happy, none of it will matter.  Without happiness and appreciation nothing external will make you happy anyway.

Don’t let anyone else tell you how to be happy.  Just BE.  Be in your moment, appreciate, and see and experience just how happy you can be. If your thoughts wander to another place, or another time that is uncomfortable, just bring yourself right back into your present moment and find something that is here and now to focus on and appreciate.



On my walk today…


I love walking in my neighbourhood.  A few weeks ago I posted some pictures of an Eagle I saw in a nest on my walk to the river by my house.

This morning I had to take my car in to the garage and when I was walking down my street, I saw these little guys in my front yard.  They are so cute, just little ones.

It was garbage day so that might have something to do with them wandering the streets at 9 am.

I spent about 10 or 15 minutes just talking to them and watching them.  I completely lost myself in the moment and was happy and smiling.  It feels good to be in your moment, not worried about anything, just being able to appreciate the little things that are right in front of you.  I feel blessed to have had this moment this morning and I am smiling now, just remembering the curiosity of these babies.

As you go through your weekend, try and have as many ‘moments of happiness’ that you can.  Live in your moment, right now, and appreciate all the things that you have, big and small.  You will feel better for it.

Love Tamara








Tiny Elephants

Don’t be fooled by those tiny elephants, they will mess you up every time.  What do tiny elephants have to do with empowerment, goal setting and personal development?  They are everywhere and if you keep falling for their tricks you will be constantly spinning your wheels, wondering how you will get it done, and be stuck doing things you’d rather not do.


I first heard about tiny elephants about 25 years ago, and I quite regularly ask myself if what is coming up is a tiny elephant, or if it is something that is a good thing no matter when it presents.

What are tiny elephants?

Tiny elephants are those things, that when you first decide they might be a good idea seem like they are so far off in the distance that they are no problem at all.

Just like an elephant that is very far away on the horizon it seems like a small thing.  As it gets closer and closer it gets bigger and bigger, and more daunting and scary.  Its not so far off now and you realize that it is not what you first thought.

You can relate these tiny elephants to goal setting or saying yes to projects.

Tiny elephants while setting goals

Lets say you set a goal to run in a marathon next spring.  You have a whole year to train for it.  You tell yourself you are going to do it, sign up for it and involve some friends.  Suppose its a really rainy cold April and you don’t get out and start training.  Then summer comes and it feels too hot to run.  Then the fall hits, and now its getting cold and snowy.  You still aren’t training to the extent you should be to be fit for a marathon in a few months.  You think you still have a lot of time though.  Then its February and that goal seems huge and undoable now.  What seemed small a year ago (tiny elephant), is now right in front of you, and it is immobilizing because it is just too big now.

Or maybe you want to lose 50 pounds.  In order to make it easy for yourself you set your timeline as 10 months from now.  Because you have 10 whole months to do it, you put it off and put it off.  Thinking that the ‘end date’ is so far into the future, that you have a lot of time.  Then all of a sudden you realize you only have 7 weeks left to go before your date is set, and your “elephant” is huge and looming.

tiny elephants

Tiny elephants and committing to a project

Lets say a friend asks you if you can help them move house 6 weeks from now.  You think, sure yeah, I can do that.  I wouldn’t do it if it was this weekend, but I can do it later.  Then as the date gets closer, the ‘elephant’ gets bigger.  The day before moving day you realize that you don’t have time to commit a whole day to that, or that you aren’t strong or healthy enough to help.  It was so far away when they first asked a long time ago, it seemed like such a small thing to have to do.

Or your boss comes up to you and asks you to take on a big project.  They tell you that you have 2 months to complete it.  You are pretty swamped at work, but two months seems like a long time.

The energy behind tiny elephants

When you are trying to consciously create the life you want it is important that you act from integrity.  Do what you say you are going to do.  If you are constantly creating in your life by looking at things as if they were very small just because they are a long way off you are setting yourself up for stress and possibly failure.

Get yourself in the habit of looking out for tiny elephants and setting yourself up for success.  When you are presented with something like this, ask yourself if it is something that you would do now.  If you can’t see yourself doing it now, chances are you won’t do it in the future.



If you need someone to help you look at your life from a fresh perspective and help you navigate changes in your life, to see if the changes you are considering are supported by Spirit, a psychic reading can help. You can contact me here.

If you want to hear what others have said about their readings you can check that out on my Psychic Reading Testimonial/Review page.


Decision Time

So, its time to make a decision.  Do you want to continue to feel the way you feel right now?  If you feel good, you will probably say, “Yes”.  If you feel bad, you will probably say “No, but…”

“But, I can’t feel good because of…”  and you may have a seemingly valid reason for saying whatever you say.  What if you could feel okay despite whatever your ‘but’ is?  You can you know, just decide.

Humans have been programmed

You have been programmed to measure things.  You have been programed to be powerless.  You have been programmed to believe things should be a certain way.  You have been programmed to fit into a certain space, even if you don’t like it.

  • your job is supposed to be a certain way
  • your grades in school
  • your income
  • your relationships
  • your home (is it clean enough, big enough, full of enough stuff?)
  • the way you feel
  • how long you mourn
  • how happy you are supposed to be in a given situation

All dictated for you!

You can deprogram yourself.  You need to be willing to think that maybe, just maybe you have been programmed and the majority of your thoughts aren’t really yours after all.  That you are so much more than your thoughts.  That you can change your life by disconnecting from the ‘matrix’ that has been laid out for you and decide to connect with your own higher self and listen to that (you) instead.

First though, you need to decide that you are open to changing the way you think.  You might not even be able to change your thoughts right away.  That’s okay.  For now, you just need to make a decision that this is your life and from here on out, you are going to take responsibility for it.

You are going to decide.  Deciding is always the hard part.  If you get stuck on your ‘but’ you won’t decide.  There are many of you that won’t even be able to make that decision.  However, not deciding really is deciding.  It is just deciding to stay the same.  Your subconscious mind and your programming will keep you stuck because you will justify your anger/sadness/frustration by blaming something outside of yourself for your mood. You will use whatever your ‘but’ is as an excuse to stay stuck in whatever space or mood you find yourself in today.  You have been programmed to be okay with that, “its normal to feel bad”.

success is a decision away

You don’t have to make a really big decision, just a small one will do.  Even if you only decide that you are stuck in your head and thoughts and can’t get out and you decide that it doesn’t feel good so you need to take a nap, that is a decision.  You have decided that you won’t stay stuck in your head for the next few hours.  I was a little bit stuck on something myself today, so I decided it was really uncomfortable and I wanted to change it (I could have made the choice to wallow, it was justified).  I did some EFT and it snapped me out of it.  If that hadn’t worked, I decided I would go for a nap.  If I hadn’t decided to change my mood, I wouldn’t have bothered, I would have kept spinning my wheels and turned a nasty morning into a nasty day.

Your thoughts are things, your thoughts are energy, energy creates, your feelings are energy.  What you feel is what you will get more of.

So I mentioned a couple ways to get out of your head if you have DECIDED to feel better.  Here’s another….

Another Quick and Easy method to change something once you have decided it needs to change.

If you DECIDE you don’t like your mood today, I want you to try something right now.

Say “What would this look like if it were different?”  And then let it go.  Go into your heart space, let it go and see what happens.

Don’t dictate what different is or looks like.  Just be willing for things to be different.  You may even notice a shift by saying those words to yourself.  It is possible to shift your reality instantly just by saying those words, (quantum physics tells us so).  You don’t even need to ‘believe’ in quantum physics, because its just there (like gravity, you don’t need to ‘believe’ in gravity for it to be working for you).

Here is a video I shared with my hubby the other day on Matrix Energetics and quantum reality.  I took some basic Matrix Energetics training around 2011 and I use it all the time for myself and sometimes when I am working with clients.

Its a pretty good explanation, give it a watch….


If you need someone to help you look at your life from a fresh perspective and help you navigate changes in your life, to see if the changes you are considering are supported by Spirit, a psychic reading can help. You can contact me here.

If you want to hear what others have said about their readings you can check that out on my Psychic Reading Testimonial/Review page.


You will always have challenges

There will never be a time in your life that you are not challenged in one area or another.  Never.  Even if your life is relatively good, you will still have challenges.  Wouldn’t it be nice if you could find a way to enjoy each challenge as it came along?

There is…

Your thoughts are what create your feelings.  Your thoughts and feelings are what creates your next steps.  Unless and until you can look at each challenge on its own, and see it for what it is, and work to get past it, you won’t allow yourself to be happy.

Funny phrase you won’t allow yourself to be happy.  A lot of you will say that you want to be happy, that I am full of it.  But really, it is you who is creating this.  Not your boss, your mate, your kids, the government.  It is you.

Because you will always have a challenge in your life, if you decide that this challenge is too hard, will never go away, or is someone else’s fault, you won’t be able to move past it.  Your intuition cannot buck the current of your determination to place blame somewhere.

allow yourself to be happy

I’m not saying this to make you feel badly.  I am saying this because its true.  You are so very powerful.  You are a creator.  It is totally in your power to overcome any challenge that may come your way.  Your first step is to always realize that you have personal power, personal power over yourself and your own thoughts, feelings and actions.

Some challenges are bigger than others, that is a given.  Being challenged in your scope of work, or in a sport is easier than losing someone you love or having an illness.  But big or small, there are ways you can support yourself through your challenges.


What is the difference between people who get past big challenges and people who don’t?

  • People who get past challenges take responsibility for their own feelings right now, they don’t wallow and blame.   Try it, this can create a huge shift in your energy immediately.  Huge.
  • They acknowledge that sometimes life just isn’t fair.  Because its not.  If you walk around thinking that life should be fair, chances are you will be disappointed ~ a lot.
  • They look at a challenge as a reason to change something.  You are either growing or dying.  If you never change anything, you aren’t growing, so what does that leave you?
  • They don’t wait for someone else to come in and change something, or rescue them, or put the past back the way it used to be.  They take action.
  • They don’t look to the past and wish it was still the same.  Sometimes life throws you curveballs.  You can’t go back.
  • They don’t turn to drugs, alcohol, food, sex or other self-destructive behaviours.  They know that they are responsible for themselves, and they generally don’t treat themselves badly like that.
  • They don’t glorify the past.  “Oh that was the perfect job, relationship, home…”  If it was perfect, it would still be there.  See things for what they are NOW.

You have absolute power over how you choose to feel and the actions you choose to take.  Every time.  Way too many of you were disempowered by your parents or other important people in your life.  Isn’t it time that you started to forget all those disempowering things you’ve been told?

Even in a 12 Step Program they say, “we admitted we were powerless”.  Don’t believe it for a minute.  People wouldn’t heal if they were powerless.  Sometimes we do need to surrender, but there can be a lot of power in surrender.

You are never powerless to overcome a challenge unless you choose to give away your power to something external (just for the record, praying is not external You are God.)  Whether you give it away willingly to another person, or unwittingly by your thoughts, that is the only way you aren’t powerful in certain situations.  Do remember though, you are still creating, even if you feel powerless.  I can tell you from personal experience, it is much more comfortable to create with intention rather than by default of thinking there is nothing you can do.