Tamara Hawk – Psychic, Medium

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I want everyone reading this to know that one of the main reasons I am sharing my personal information on this blog is in order to share the fact that I am a “normal” human too, and go through the same type of stuff as everyone else.

Occasionally, people will say “oh that’s easy for you to say”, or they will say “well, you have a gift, life is easy for you!”

I just want to say that generally these statements couldn’t be farther from the truth. Stuff happens in my life too. As much as I share these posts to help you with your own stuff, I do not share them to get any sympathy or anything like that. I’m fine. I will always be fine. As will you. I just want to share on the off-chance that something that I write along the way will help you to see your own life from a different, more helpful perspective.

As most of you know, I’ve been doing less readings lately, probably a quarter (or maybe even less), than I used to do each month. I took some months off over summer to rejuvenate. Through the fall I have done some readings from those on my waitlist. I haven’t got to everyone yet, nor does it look like I will be through the list any time soon. I do not know if I will ever get to a point where I do as many psychic readings as I used to.

I like to do readings, to connect with the energy of all the wonderful people I meet weekly. Over the past year though, I have found I get very tired when I do them. My own guides and higher self have been telling me to stop for a while. I must admit, I don’t necessarily always listen any better than anyone else on the planet. “But I don’t want to stop”, I say, “I like doing readings”. However, I know that I must honour what I am being told and only do them when I truly feel I can.

My intention now, is to help more people on their own journeys in this lifetime with my blog and my writing. I’m hoping that some of the insights that you may read here will help you to connect with your own soul and guides.

Its really important to listen when your intuition is telling you something. Our Higher Selves know what we truly want, and our Soul has a way of helping things along for us. The trick is to listen and trust so that you don’t wind up in a position of discomfort along the way.

We have ultimate control over what happens with us, to us and for us. However, sometimes while manifesting something, if we remain unaware, or afraid, our Soul takes over and provides a jolt to get us moving in the direction we are trying to manifest.

On September 3, 2009 my husband fell down some stairs at work and broke his shin bone. Snapped it in half. The recovery for this is 4-6 months. We are partners in a construction company and he is the sole ‘worker’ on our jobsites.

Both of us have wanted him to hire someone else to help him as when we get busy with the company as there are days or sometimes weeks when we hardly see each other. I remember in 2007 wondering if we should drum up some more business. My husband said, “I have more work than I can handle, we don’t need more clients. Our Customer Service might suffer then”.

A lot of our business is about 1.5 hours drive from our home. In 2008, business was so brisk that we considered renting an apartment for my husband closer to the city to save him time, because he’d get home around 8:30 at night and leave at 5:30 the next morning. He was driving 3-6 hours a day. The gas savings alone would pay for an apartment easily. (Remember how expensive gas was that year?)

In February 2009, I first asked him if he wanted to hire someone else to help him. As there were issues with the global economy and there were less jobsites out there, he said, “No, what if I don’t have enough work to keep an employee busy”. I asked him a few times throughout 2009 if he wanted to hire someone as I felt a pull from him that he didn’t want to be working quite so hard in a physically demanding way. The answer was always “No, what if there isn’t enough work”.

Then while at my son’s soccer practice on a Thursday night my cell phone rang. It was my honey calling from an ambulance saying that he broke his leg. Of course my first thought was (sorry for the crudeness), “Oh my God, we’re screwed”. I’d like to point out that all in all 2009 wasn’t a very lucrative year for construction at all, and we were quite grateful to even still be in business as there were a lot of companies that no longer existed at this point. Also, I hadn’t been making much money for about 3 months by now.

Once my son’s soccer practice was over and we’d eaten dinner, and I had calmed down, we headed out for the one and a half hour drive to the hospital. Driving down the highway for that long in the dark is a great place to ponder and contemplate things and to meditate. By the time I got to the hospital I was quite excited! Me and my son got to my husband’s room, and after a brief period of me asking how he was and going through hearing the details of what happened etc., I said to my husband “I am so excited, this is wonderful! Finally we can hire someone and we will be able to spend more time together!!”

He was a little doped up by this time and looked at me like I was a little nuts. He’s lived with me for a long time though so it only took him a few minutes to get on board with my way of perceiving his accident.

Here is it 11 weeks or so later, and finally things are moving a little again. We went through a couple of months with no work, no employees, no accounts receivable, no income at all. Of course all the expenses of being self employed and just living in general were still there.

I’ve not been doing as many readings either, so my income isn’t exactly helping out a lot. I have never done readings just for the money. I can tell you, I could easily put myself out there and offer up a ton of more readings and make a lot of money. But, I know I’m not supposed to be doing so many, so I know darn well, that my ability to do quality readings would be hindered.

I truly think that the only difference between me and someone else in this situation is the way I perceive it. I look at what is going on, and how it will bring us closer to where we dream of being, rather than perceiving it as a negative thing. I truly believe that if my husband and I thought that this was a horrible thing, it would be a horrible thing. Instead, we took it more as an opportunity though. We put an ad in the paper in October and hired someone. He’s only working a few days here and there for us because right this minute we don’t have that much work for him. We have now gone ahead and started with our marketing plan to get more clients. As with any marketing plan, it can take a bit of time, and with starting now, by the time we get more business my husband will be back on his feet and we will have him and an employee to cover off all our customers and provide good service.

This is what we have wanted for a couple of years now. It never seemed to be a good time to go ahead and do it though. There was always a reason not to move forward with hiring, or expanding. All those reasons are of course based in fear, not trust. With my husband breaking his leg, it certainly provided a catalyst and motivation to move forward. For this I am grateful.

We have more bills, less savings, will likely have less “gifts” at Christmas, yet life feels so very good. There is movement. Movement towards what we have envisioned for ourselves. We have a lot more time to enjoy each other’s company that’s for sure.

Life truly is a wonderful gift, a fun game to play and can be as exciting and full, or as stressful and empty as we want it to be! It is our choice

Maybe just the end of the world as we know it. No, the world is not going to implode or explode or be completely destroyed in any form for that matter. 2012 is a new beginning, not an end.

There has been so much said about all this, from the bible, from Nostradamus, from Edgar Cayce, from the Mayans. In 2012 we will truly be able to experience heaven on earth. For some, this has already started. We are already feeling these changes. There are many people on this earth who have Ascended from the 3D reality to the 5th Dimension reality already. The Earth herself has ascended from 3D to 5D. In 5D time and space are different, they do not exist in the same way as they do in 3D. This is why so many people are having experiences outside what the “norm” has been the past few thousand years.

Some people think the financial meltdowns etc. are really bad news. It is just a change, different things going on, it doesn’t have to be bad news. Everything is perception. A lot of people are being forced to change the way they have been thinking, or the way they have been doing things. So much of the world’s issues right now are related to the old 3D ways crumbling. It is a new beginning, not an ending.

Jesus (or whatever Ascended Master you relate to based on your religion or lack thereof), IS coming. It is the Christ Consciousness in us all. Jesus “the man” is not going to just show up one day to save us. Its not quite like that. The consciousness of Jesus will show up for us all as soon as we realize that we have access to it. It is your own greatness, your own Christ Consciousness that will save you. Your realization that you are God. We ourselves are the second coming.

What makes things so hard is the separation from the divine light and love of all that is. For many years people have turned to religion, or leaders that tell us that things are outside of ourselves. Those in perceived power don’t want us to know that the power of EVERYTHING is within us. We are all one.

The talk of hellfire and hell coming to earth for those that do not accept Jesus into their lives is true in some ways, but not in the literal sense that some organized religions would have you believe. It has to do with those that accept they are the creators themselves. Those that can see and feel their own greatness will truly be creating a heaven on earth for themselves and those around them.

Those that rely on (or “worship”), things from the 3D reality — money and ego and external power — truly will be in a hell on earth. Earth and her energy is changing, has already changed. We, as a species, are learning that we can create whatever we want here. It has very little to do with ego and power. There are many on the earth right now who are here to help with this transition. Many lightworkers who are ascending and “getting it” are here to help you. Many are actually devoting their lives to helping others remember where they came from and what divine beings they are. The first wave of Ascension is over. There are many Masters on this plane of our planet right now. Willing to help you to realize you don’t have to stay stuck in 3D any more. Many people think Jesus is a saviour, as in separate from you, that will come and rescue you from your life, your existence, yourself, your perceived sins. God is not going to “make people go to hell”. What kind of loving God would actually make people go to hell? If all one does is worship money, control or power they WILL likely end up in their own hell. This will be their own doing (or undoing) though. It will not be something that is done TO them.

Look at how things are right now. The world financial crisis is HUGE. Anyone who is very centred in, or worships, money or power at this point in time is RIGHT NOW in their own personal HELL. God certainly isn’t putting them there. It is their perception of their time on earth that is putting them there.

Those that are suffering right now just need to look inside themselves, at the Christ Consciousness, at the God in THEM. Hanging onto the old 3D reality and the worship of external things like money or power or ego is what is causing them suffering. The always wanting more is causing suffering. There is enough on this earth for everyone. Some say they don’t believe that…I’ve had people tell me to my face that I’m full of you know what just for suggesting such a thing.

The reality of it though….at least MY reality of it is that there is enough for all. If we take the greed, the control, the lusting for external power away, there is enough.

All through the bible it states that God is in all of us. Therefore, Love is in all of us.

Religions made the devil up to scare the heck out of people. There were, and still are, those that do not want you to know your own greatness. They don’t want you to know what they know. If everyone knew, there would be balance. No one would be better than, or richer than. Everyone would just “Be”.

Religions say the devil “fell from grace” because he wanted to be God-like. What better way to make people shun their own greatness, their own connection with God. Scare the crap out of them so that when they start to realize their own greatness, and that they are not just a “part of Source (God)”, but that they are indeed Source (God) themselves, the creators of their own lives and spiritual journeys, they get afraid and experience more separation. As soon as people realize their greatness, no one will be able to control them. That is very scary for those that think they have the power over the masses.

We are all God-like. We are all creators, God is Love, we are all a part of God. This scares a lot of people and there are certain governments and religions that don’t want people to know this, so they make up stuff like the devil or demons to scare people. They don’t want the general population to realize their power, they would lose their own place in society; in the 3D reality they have created for themselves. Imagine if everyone knew just how much like God we are, how much a part of God we are…..no one could control us anymore. No one would have the power to “make” us fearful. God is Love…..the “devil” is fear.

So, is 2012 the end of the world? I certainly hope it is the end of the world as we have known it up to this point.

Do not fear the changes, embrace them. Connect with Source in your own way. Find and connect with your own internal Christ Consciousness, your own greatness.

When things are done with Love and not fear, nothing but God and Love can shine through.

There are many things going on. Being a psychic lightworker myself (for lack of a better term), I know that what I see and do, anyone can see and do. The biggest challenge is to KNOW that you can do it. It is just a matter of being open to it and having the realization that we are all Source.

Remember where you came from, remember your divinity. Connect with your own Christ Consciousness. Experience the bliss every day, feel the love every day. Live with Love not Fear of what is going on on our earth. Its all good….

So I’m learning to take the time out to be kinder to myself. Are you?

For so many years, with having a young family to take care of I never made the time for myself anymore. I was working a lot, too much, and worrying too much about cleaning the house and making my family comfortable to consider how it was impacting me.

This past summer it caught up with me big time. I ended up being not much use to anyone. Not to family, myself or my clients. Not exactly the result I was looking for.
For the last few months, I have been doing my darndest to put myself up there on my priority list. I am feeling better for it. I have more energy, more time in my days – mostly due to the fact that I am taking time for me, and not just praying for a chance to sleep or nap.

I got to the point where I found that there were days I just couldn’t wait for tomorrow, because I was too tired to do anything else. I kept thinking “tomorrow will be better, I will get a good sleep and feel better and be able to do more tomorrow”. It often didn’t work out that way. The next day I was just as tired as I was the day before.

I think part of the issue was the ‘able to do more tomorrow’ part. I would often find myself waking up early in the morning thinking of all the things I wanted or needed to take care of that day. Of course this kept me from getting back to sleep and I would wind up with another tired day. Another day of waiting for tomorrow before I allowed myself to feel better.

Most of us need to learn that it is okay to relax. If we take out some time in our day for ourselves it does not make us a bad person. Quite the contrary. There were so many nights that I was just exhausted. I would put my son to bed and be so tired that I did not have the patience to deal with the 8 year old child things that came up. My son would get a little goofy, or need a drink of water or just want to talk and I found myself saying “I’m sorry honey, mommy is so very tired, can you just get into bed, I don’t have much patience right now”. I didn’t like to feel that way, but exhaustion has a funny way of turning everything upside down.

Last February I went for lunch with a girlfriend that I had not seen since November. When I saw her, I said “Have you been working out big time or what!?!?”
She looked fabulous. All toned up and firm and she’d lost 25 pounds or so. She told me she’d let me in on her secret. She took me to a local place here in Chilliwack called Gentl Bella. The have these vibration machines there that you stand on and they use vibration to work your muscles. My first thought was that it was cheating. I had been working out on my elliptical trainer for 8 months, had lost over 30 pounds and felt great. I wanted to try the vibration machine but it just felt like it wasn’t really working if I didn’t sweat, I didn’t ‘feel the burn’ or come off panting.

I decided to try it anyway. I figured it wouldn’t hurt, and what’s wrong with things being easy for a change. I kept up with my elliptical but I added in the vibration machine too. I had reached a plateau at a 33 pound weight loss up to February. After adding the vibration machine to my workouts, I lost an additional 12 pounds. It changed things up and added just enough to get me past the plateau and get me back to the weight I was before. (I had gained about 45 pounds over the past 5 years).

I joined the ‘club’ and paid about $600 for 6 months worth of vibration. I must say, it is truly an amazing thing. I’m 43 now and like most women who are a bit older I was getting a bit of a jowl, and it was really hard to keep my upper arms from flapping in the breeze. The vibration machine helped me lose weight on (or firm up) my face, and helped to define my arms a lot better. I’m not saying I’m looking like I did in my 20’s but I look, and much more importantly, FEEL way better.

Once my membership at the club was done, around July sometime I bought my own vibration machine for use at home. I can’t even begin to tell you how wonderful these things are. I think I might see if I can get my hands on a few more units, or find a way to sell them myself. They are that awesome. I find they help with my energy levels a lot too. Imagine, a workout with no sweat.

Back to talking about taking care of yourself. There are many ways to take care of yourself. Something else I personally did was go to a naturopath. For years I had always thought “one day I’ll get around to it”. There always seemed to be other things that took precedence. I had heard that going to the naturopath could get expensive and everyone else’s needs always seemed more important. I could spend money on my kid, my husband, my horse, but when it came to spending money on myself I had a really hard time with that.

Some time in the spring, when I was at my wits end and tired as could be, I finally figured I really needed something. I didn’t know exactly what it was but I knew that my body needed attention because it was burning out. I went and had a few tests and things, and got some shocking results to some of my tests, and got on a really good vitamin and mineral regimen and its working. At the time I got my test results there was a part of me that cried out “just give me the prescription, I want to feel better right now!!” However, I’ve never been one to take a lot of medication without first trying to balance myself out with diet or exercise or energy work or meditation. So, here it is 3 months since I’ve been on all my new vitamins and I am feeling a lot better. If you have been on the fence about whether or not you deserve or can afford to go to a naturopath or other alternative health care provider, take this blog post as the “sign” you have been waiting for to go and take care of yourself. There are no coincidences.

In closing, I’d just like to say how much I care for and appreciate each and every one of you. It is Thanksgiving here in Canada and I have so much to be thankful for. Thank you for reading, you are amazing.