How do you define yourself? What is it that makes you you? Do you even know anymore? Is your definition of yourself based on what the people around you tell you? Or based on your health? Your financial circumstances? Where you live? The work you do?
Who are you? Really. Think about it. When you say to yourself “I am”, what follows those words?
Do you say, “I am a mom”, “I am an executive”, “I am a healer”, “I am sick”, “I am struggling”, “I am a construction worker”, “I am busy”.
What are you? Who are you?
Society tells us that without some clear-cut definition of ourself, a definition that must contain some third dimensional words, we have no purpose. We are bombarded with messages that tell us we need to be busy. I can’t even count how many TV commercials, shows, or Newscasts that I see that contain messages that we are busy all the time (think “Programming”).
When we see these messages, we think to ourselves that if we are not busy, or if we allow ourselves to just “be” or have some down-time, then there must be something wrong with us. Maybe we aren’t working hard enough. What is wrong with me that I am not all frazzled like everyone else, maybe I need to be doing more. What can I add to my life that will make me more like everyone else?
What about the “programming” that tells us we are stressed, overworked, broke, stuck in a career and not really getting ahead? We are told constantly that that is “how we (and things) are these days”. The messages, and programs that we get bombarded with are there to keep us struggling. We are told we have no power, no control, no peace, no calm.
Without some awareness that we are being “PROGRAMMED” it is really easy to fall into the trap of feeling completely dis-empowered and out of control of our lives. We are not at the mercy of all these external circumstances. WE ARE NOT!
We are only at the mercy of our thoughts, feelings, and vibrations. What we think about is what we create in our lives. Everything is energy. Your thoughts and feelings are energy that cause you to vibrate at a certain level. You can change your vibration by changing your thoughts.
There are many men and women out there that have no self-worth whatsoever unless they are ‘busy’. They keep adding more and more and more to their plate in the hopes that someone, anyone, will recognize that they are worthy. Please, tell me I am appreciated, please tell me that I am doing something right, please acknowledge that I am a someone, that the world would not be the same without me.
The problem with that is that your self-worth cannot ever come from someone else. It needs to come from within. No amount of doing, or busy-ness, or running around will get you what you want. Chances are, the people around you are doing the same thing. Do you even have time to acknowledge their contribution. Most of the time, probably not. Most people are too self-absorbed in playing this game of “busy-ness” to even notice others, never mind acknowledge their contribution.
It is a vicious circle. The best way to get the recognition you deserve is from yourself. Take a really good look at yourself and what you do. Thank yourself for your contribution. Do not resent the fact that you are busy and no one appreciates you. Do what makes you feel good, and appreciate yourself.
There are some things that we must do. Care for our children for example. Do you care for your children in the hope that you will get some recognition for it, or do you care for your children out of a space of loving them and loving what you do for and with them? (If you do not have children, this could also be your job, your home, your relationships).
You need to treat ALL parts of your life like that. Do what you enjoy and what fills your heart with love. When your heart is full of love, recognition does not matter as much. You end up recognizing yourself as a loving being, and worrying less when those around you are not loving. You will be able to observe the fact that they are not loving ~ whether they are not loving themselves, or maybe not loving you or other people ~ but it won’t matter so much to you. You will be operating your life from a place of love rather than judgement ~ of yourself or of them.
Even if you hate your job, there must be something that it is giving you. If it wasn’t giving you anything at all there would be no point in doing it. Love what it is giving you. Even if it is just enough money, or not enough money. Love and appreciate it for what it is. The more love you have for anything in your life, the more love your life will give you. Love will open doors and create more opportunities for you.
There are many people out there that have burned themselves out by trying to be what other people (or society) expect them to be. If this goes on long enough it blocks the flow of energy and creates health problems in our bodies. How this manifests is partly dependent on your belief systems and what part of yourself you are denying. Sometimes the only way we think we can take a moment for ourselves is if we are sick.
This is not a conscious decision. It’s not like “geeze, I need a rest, I think I’ll make myself sick so my family has to take care of me”. It is a subconscious decision (yes decision). “I have done enough, I give and I give and I give and no one appreciates me, I always give more than I get, I resent the fact that I have to do so much for so little in return!”
After a time, months, perhaps years, finally…BAM! You just can’t take it anymore! Your body comes up with fibromyalga, or chronic fatigue syndrome, or cancer, or some other illness that STOPS you in your tracks. As much as the illness is upsetting to you, it is in and around your body because that is where you were vibrating. You were resentful, or busy, or under appreciated, or trying to fit into someone elses perception of you, and your Soul just can’t take it anymore.
This is not meant to BLAME you for your illness. I have been sick myself. My doctor told me “Sounds like CFS (chronic fatigue syndrome) to me”. He also said “I won’t give you a prescription for painkillers because I know you don’t like to take them”.
My naturopath said “Well, I won’t tell you you have fibromyalga because you do not belive that it is a proper diagnosis, but doing these things (she gave me a list of things, that people do when they have been diagnosed with fibromyalga) might work for you”.
A lot of people want a “DIAGNOSIS”. It is easier to get a diagnosis and either give up, or try to “treat an illness” than it is to look inside at what is not working with your energy field. It gives you a way to define yourself or your life. It gives you something to focus on that is centred around you and self-care. Your whole life you have likely been taking care of other people (whether they asked for it or wanted it or not). Your entire focus was on how to help them, be there for them ~ defining who you were by how they saw you.
Now with an illness its all about you. Why not practice self-love, self-care, self-esteem, allow yourself to do what makes you truly happy, (no martyrdom), and just skip the piece about getting “sick and tired.” When you get to a space of being able to say simply “I am”, without any further words, that is when you will truly begin to know, love and appreciate yourself.